[A Year in Review: 2013]

When I look back at 2013, what stands out to me? Honestly, it is the people and the learning I've been doing, but sometimes those are hard to put into lists. I will do my best to let those impactful and defining things give me guidance as I sum up my year.

12 New Experiences of 2013
These experiences are meaningful to me, all for different reasons. I am thankful for a God who delights in bringing his daughter joy through the newness in life. 
1. Learning to trust God's provision in raising support for IVLI. 
2. Training for and running a half marathon.
3. Working at the bookstore. This is one of those jobs that will always mean more to me than just being one of the ten part-time jobs I've had. 
4. Standing up in my best friend Hannah's wedding and watch her marry Joel. 
5. Living in my own apartment, buying and cooking all of my own food. 
6. Making the decision to be committed. 
7. Owning and caring for plants; it just feels so right. It is an inexplicable joy.
8. Doing "100 days of praise" and writing/sketching what God was doing every day this summer.
9. Going cliff jumping at Mt. Simon
10. Sharing my testimony at IVLI, Fall Breakaway, and Fall Conference
11. Eating meat again, especially because that means I get to eat food slathered in BBQ sauce again, like pulled pork, ribs, and brisket. 
12. Welcoming four new members into my extended family (3 babies and a wife!): Katie, Hayden, Yvette, and Evelyn. 

Travel Adventures 
I am created to itch for spontaneous adventure, local eats, tall buildings and green mountains, and long car rides. Every place I get to travel, near or far, is a gift that feeds my soul. 
1. Platteville, Wisconsin [Justin's talk at IV] - February 2013
2. Pine Ridge, South Dakota [InterVarsity spring break trip] - March 2013
3. Milwaukee, Wisconsin [Rachel's Graduation] - May 2013
4. Kansas City, Missouri [IHOP] - May 2013
5. Beloit, Kansas [Hannah's Wedding] - June 2013
6. Minneapolis & Saint Cloud, Minnesota [Visiting Anna, Molly, Jordan, Maddie, James, and Katie] - June 2013
7. Fridley & Minneapolis, Minnesota [Visiting Jaimie, Jake & Katie's Wedding] - June 2013
8. Winneconne, Wisconsin [Hetrick fourth of July celebrations] - July 2013
9. Cedarville, Michigan [IVLI] - July 2013
10. Mackinac Island, Michigan [IVLI] - July 2013
11. Cascade, Wisconsin [time at the cottage with Jamie, family, and Luke] - August 2013
12. Waterford, Wisconsin [roadtrip with Luke to visit his family] - August 2013
13. Orange City, Iowa [roadtrip with Molly to visit Northwestern and Dordt friends!] - October 2013
14. Minneapolis, Minnesota [twenty-one pilots concert] - October 2013
15. Alexandria, Minnesota [IV Fall Conference] - October 2013
16. Minneapolis, Minnesota [MOA/IHOP roadtrip] - November 2013
17. Madison, Wisconsin [Zimmerman family Thanksgiving] - November 2013
18.  Waterford, Wisconsin [Gladis/Zimmerman Thanksgiving] - November 2013
19. Kansas City, Missouri [IHOP one thing Conference] - December 2013
20. Zumbro Falls, Minnesota [Rachel's farm] - December 2013

Favorite Things I've Done with Others
It is impossible to capture every meaningful moment with the people I love. The entirety of my blog even fails to do that. But here are some moments that are particularly special to me with people that mean a lot in my life. 
1. Every moment I've spent with Molly Bray. Whether we are having phone conversations, sleepovers, cuddle time, laughing, crying, eating, or just sitting together, I love being with her. This girl knows my heart like none other and she knows just how to care for me. 
2. Becoming large group MC with Taylor for InterVarsity and developing meaningful relationships with the large group team over two semesters. 
3. Getting to use photography to serve Grace, James, Lexie, Trent, and Luke. 
4. Having a picnic on Putnam rock.
5. Weekly outdoor adventures with Meghan this summer. 
6. Laying on Lexie's bed and just being touched and having real conversations every two weeks for 6 months.
7. Pursuing a relationship primarily through written letters. (So hard, so good.)
8. Swimming in freezing cold Lake Heron with Caleb and Micah.
9. Sleeping outside in a hammock and watching the sunrise the next morning with Noel.
10. Waking up at 5am to climb a ski hill, break into a chair lift, and watch the sunrise. 
11. Getting baptized in the Chippewa river and eating pie afterwards with people who mean so much to me.
12. Every conversation I've had with Jenna in the last 5 months. Especially while looking at Christmas lights or baking pumpkin bread.
13. Being a superfan with Ashley for Ben & Luke's frisbee game.
14.  Going to Racy's on Sunday afternoons with Alexi.
15. Blogging in an actual blogging community. 
16. Eating ice cream for breakfast with Alexi and Justin at the Goat.
17. The day of rest and fun with the Govs leaders; soccer, bowls, the rope activity, and laughter.
18. Going to the norske nook for pie with Ben, Ashley, and Luke.
19. A spontaneous road trip to MOA and IHOP with my friends.
20. Caroling in a nursing home with all of my friends from Govs
21. Having double dates with James & Maddie, Trent & Lexie, Ben & Ashley, Sam & Drew, Nico & Charmaine, and Tom & Kelsey. 
22. Hottubbing, movies, nail painting, talking and laughing with Jordan and Maddie. 
23. Going on a sleigh ride in the snow through the woods with Luke. 

10 New Creations
Made in God's image, I am wired to create, whether it is through poetry, painting, or simply pulling together a unique outfit every morning. 
1. The collages I've made, especially my life story at CFW, my Jesus thank you note, and Isaiah 61. 
2. Quinoa cakes with roasted red peppers and eggplant
3. Self-created paleo blueberry coffee cake
4. The adventure film I made this summer
5. Decorating my dorm room at Eau Claire
6. Paintings! I can't decide if my hybrid spirit animal or my depiction of the top of the world is my favorite.
7. Eggplant parmesan made by Maddie and myself for Luke and James. 
8. Bacon apple pie!
9. The video in the beauty of fall I made with Alexi about thankfulness.
10. The video Luke filmed with me for his class project

10 Self-Discoveries
I am a unique creature, unable to be placed in a single box or category. I am hard-wired a certain way, but the beautiful part is, that doesn't constrain me, instead, it spurs me on to further growth. Oh, such joy in discovering more about who I am made to be. 
1. Singing is so important to me and learning how to play guitar has been really challenging but exciting.
2. Writing poetry is one of the most cathartic experiences I've ever had. Sharing it is one of the scariest and rewarding experiences I've ever had. 
3. I have learned so much about fears that I have, but I have learned even more about the power I have over them in Jesus' name. 
4. Creating videos is one of my main passions. I love doing it as a form of art. I also love creating videos of other peoples' stories. 
5. Chocolate and ice cream are two of my favorite foods, in pretty much all shapes and forms. It takes a lot of self-discipline to not eat these miraculous foods 24/7. 
6. Being active is my jam. Longboarding and climbing are two newly-discovered passions. Also, throwing footballs and kicking soccer balls is so life-giving to me, and I am thankful for patient friends because I'm actually quite bad at sports. Not being able to run for six months was one of the hardest parts of 2013. 
7. I could eat oatmeal for breakfast every single day for the rest of my life and be totally content.
8. Drama class is the best class I have ever taken and God used it to teach me more than 4 semesters of gen eds.
9. Being with children brings me loads of joy and spending time with them is a necessity to remind me of God's tenderness and sweet love. Children also make me way laugh more than most grown ups could. 
10. Put me anywhere under a string of christmas lights and I will be at peace and really content. 

Top 20 Musics (In no particular order)
Music is such a beautiful part of life as it pulls me closer to my Jesus, closer to who I am as a person, and closer to others around me. 
1. The World is a Beautiful Place and I Am No Longer Afraid To Die
2. The Whale CD & The Shark CD
3. Molly's Mix Part 1-4
4. Instrumental music, especially The End of the Ocean & Anesthesia
5. Twenty-One Pilots concert
6. onething (especially Misty Edwards & Jon Thurlow)
7. A Life That's Worthy EP - Jon Thurlow 
8. Open Mic with Luke, Ben, and Adam
9. Sleep Well by MAE
10. Jamming to Wagon Wheel 
11. Worship nights in the basement of Govs
12. Build Your Kingdom Here at Jacob's Well
13. The Harvest Bashta EP
14. Heroes For Sale Album - Andy Mineo
15. Instruments of Mercy Album - Beautiful Eulogy
16. Holy Spirit - Bryan & KatieTorwalt
17. Drifter - Corey Kilgannon
18. Better Love - Green River Ordinance
19. Ben Howard
20. Instead of Ashes Album - Clement Chen

Characteristics of God Revealed in 2013
God is so vast I, as a human, will never be able to know him as he knows me. But he does take great care to reveal himself to me. Here are the parts of him that have been continually revealed this year.
1. Father
2. Healer
3. Patient
4. Love
5. Faithful
6. Friend
7. Creator
8. Redeemer
9. Author
10. Worthy

Looking Forward to in 2014
1. Learning more about what it means to be a daughter of God, a friend, and a girlfriend.
2. Seeing further reconciliation in my family.
3. Traveling more and seeing how God uses my desire to travel for His purposes.
4. Dragon movies and Wes Anderson creations
5. Working towards my goals
6. Running again
7. Crossing more experiences off of my Eau Claire bucket list
8. Finally taking SPED classes
9. Changes, such as new roommates and new bible study co-leaders
10. Returning to Pine Ridge 

[Kansas City]

Oh Kansas City, your tall skyscrapers and 50 degree sunshine tugged at my heartstrings. 
Spending a week in your conference center going to one thing and growing closer to Jesus and 4 of my friends made me want to run back to you every New Years. See you again soon, my friend. 

Driving through Wisconsin is probably one of the most delightful experiences in the world to me. 

Spending a week with these four ladies was absolutely incredible. God has opened up my heart to them and to himself through them. Wowsa. 

 Have you ever looked out and seen seven screens of your favorite speaker talking to 30,000 people?

It's pretty dang amazing. #allenhood #onething

Sunshine! MMM! This was our favorite hallway to nap, eat, and relax in. 

Andrew, Rachel, Afton, and I watched the sunset over the city. It was so beautiful; sunsets literally get me every time. I love spontaneous adventures and breaking into new places.

Oh city lights, you increase my wanderlust and my desire for fresh roasted coffee.

Wow. God paints a new one of these every night, in every city. What the heck?!

Little baby Jesus feet on long car rides home.

Rachel's beautiful farm. Oh blue skies. Oh bare trees. Oh white snow. 

I think farms are my heart language. Especially in the wintertime. 

Highlights include: Oklahoma Joe's pulled pork sandwiches, 4 in a bed snuggle time, Misty Edwards worship sets, getting to hear Jon Thurlow play both in the prayer room and at the conference, Jesus revelations, incredible speakers that have been making me think, getting to hold Molly's hand on the daily, getting coffee with Alexi and talking with her, being so encouraged by everything Alexi says, meeting and chatting with Kahealani (this girl has a rocking' EP free on noise trade!), getting prophesied over, long road trips with good conversations and encouraging friends, meeting Rachel's grandparents, and spending the morning on Rachel's farm. 

[Gratitude]

[This is for you, Alexi, to get you through while I'm trying to overcome my blogging funk.]

I am thankful...

...for friends who have farms and Dr. Phil's warm coat.

...for horses that are kind instead of scary and allow me to fully enjoy God's creation.

...for these glasses, which I will probably end up wearing on the daily. #nipsturd

...for this picture of Alexi who is just one of my favorite people and brings a heck of a lot of joy and light to my life. 

...for the time and resources to be able to freely craft while I have so much down time at home. This is my newly painted poetry journal. Get it? Poetree? I'm clever, I know. 

and...

...for mothers who let me crash their Friday night movie dates with friends when I don't have any.
...for Copper Rock, even though it's no Racy's.
...for the sweater I've taken out of my laundry bag 4 times in the last month because it's just that warm.
...for trips to Chipotle and finding chocolate hidden in my car. 
...for long phone conversations with long-distance friends who know how to speak straight to my heart. Well, not quite as well as Jesus does, but he is speaking through them, so it's pretty darn close.

[Letters]

This is a more regular occurrence than it should be. 

Watching the guys at 420. 

Dear Dad- T-minus 6 days until your favorite holiday. My-oh-my how I will miss coming down in the morning and drinking coffee with you and sharing the couch with you. Thanks for teaching me the importance of celebrating. Dear 3 Humble Dudes from Eau Claire - You guys played a pretty stellar set last night at open mic. I really like hearing you three share your musical talents; you inspire me. Dear Finals Week - Sometimes I pick up way too many work shifts during you, which doesn't leave me much time to study when obviously I need to be social as well. There's always next semester for solid grades. Dear Toes and Fingers - Sometimes I wonder if you'll ever be warm. I usually buy hot drinks for the sole (haha, get it?) purpose of helping you out. I also fantasize about pouring hot coffee directly into my socks on the daily. Also, fingers, you are currently sporting 10 different colors of nail polish; I dig it. Dear Friends - This strange week means I get to see a lot more of some of you (Jordan, Maddie, and the guys), but a lot less of some of you. Why can't I have the best of both worlds? #hannahmontanaprobs

[Over the Weekend]

I am thankful…

...for surprise dates with Luke that include authentic delis, absolutely magical sleigh rides, sitting by three fires, and of course, eating ice cream, drinking coffee and watching Wes Anderson. 
…for curfews and actually getting sleep lately.
...for Saturday morning caf dates with my best friend Molly.
...for afternoons at Racy's spent journaling with hot coffee watching the slow snow.
...for the Governor's community and our annual white elephant exchange.
...for Jenna and the way we connect. I think we could spend hours talking and never run out of things to talk about. She is so wise.
...for gift cards from appreciative friends and learning how to receive love in this way.
…for oranges, always for oranges.
...for christmas lights, especially when set to music.
...for difficult conversations that span for days, truth that triumphs over lies, and giving up everything to God when I realize I just can't do it on my own. 
...for Jordan, who saved my butt when I was making these brownies today and who I know genuinely cares when she asks how I am doing. 
...for a life worth celebrating. 
...for spontaneous fireworks that made an adventure/fake birthdate the most magical evening of all.
...for moonlit tromping in the snowy woods and harvested corn fields. 
...for finding out exciting news. and sort of unrelated: for Ariel and the time we get to spend together.
...for Alexi, and how our blogs have basically become secret notes to each other. (I love you dearly).
...for moments of intimacy with God and realizing how he truly is the only one who can satisfy.

[Gratitude]

Some days, I am just overwhelmed by how much God loves me. I should be thanking him every single day for all that he does for me, but my offerings are meager in contrast to his greatness. 

I am thankful…

…for good earth tea that soothes my sore, once again sick, throat. 
…for mornings I can sleep in and move slowly.
…for ASL classes that only last 20 minutes.
…for that abandoned room with green walls whose corners have held me as I've cried.
…for scripture and truth sent in times of great need.
…for sunny rooms and honest conversations with Jordan.
…for finally being able to see my dear sister, Molly.
…for Alexi hugs and how she makes me feel like the most important person on earth whenever I see her.
…that I can watch Holland and Coral laugh together and have my heart be lightened. 
…for afternoons spent in Davies, leaning against Ariel's legs, getting a back massage, and discussing some of the scarier things of our lives, but claiming that Jesus is greater.
…for Yui, because he covers me up with his giant puffy coat when I am freezing. 
…for Coral and the way she so willingly and honestly shares. I am so blessed by that girl and really hopeful that we can have a blogging community party next week with many of our lovely friends. 
…that I continue to be pursued by a Godly man who challenges me, cares for me, and makes me laugh until my sides hurt. His sense of adventure and willingness to encourage my orange obsession bless me.
…for spontaneous thankful, hopeful, and how-God-is-working lists with Michelle when life seems gloomy.
…for coming home to paper snowflakes taped to my door with bible verses written on them. 
…for ab ripper with Ben and Luke that brought me way back to last April and made me see how far we've all come. So grateful for these two. Also, my hip flexors hurt and I won't be able to walk tomorrow. 
…for my bible study. I was almost in tears tonight as I realized how much I just love being with these people, my sisters, my friends. They question, they laugh, they make me laugh, and they have insights that blow me out of the water. They also give me candy, which rocks. 
…for a God who consistently pursues me and works towards my transformation even when I don't remember or acknowledge it. He is a redeemer. He is a friend. His promises are trustworthy and true. 

For that I am infinitely grateful. 

[Gratitude]

I am thankful…

…for fat snowflakes that fall on my head and cover the ground and make for great Christmas spirit!
…for boys that let me play football with them, even when I can't throw as far as them and sometimes my fingers freeze and I do the splits sliding in the snow.
…for Jordan Gilbertson; her touches, her snapchats, and the way that she always makes me feel so welcomed and loved whenever I walk into James' room. 
…for the "Good News of Great Joy" advent devotional and how much it is blowing me away every single day. "Do not think, because you experience adversity, that the hand of the Lord is shortened. It is not our prosperity but our holiness that he seeks with all his heart." 
…for this boy and the poetry he creates and the art he sees and the ways he inspires me.
…for skylight and being able to see Alexi and Anna and receive love from them through touch and through words. 
…for a blogging community with Ariel and Alexi and how excited we get about each other's blogs.
…for Justin Weber and the words of encouragement and affirmation he speaks into me. Also, the way that he cares for me by making me tea and throwing away my tissues when I miss the trash.
…for the ability to focus and get work done these past few days.
…for this three hour medley of Christmas songs that just gets me in the spirit and reminds me of evenings with my friends. 
…for phone conversations with my mother when life is good and we get to rejoice in that together.
…for God providing all kinds of crazy opportunities when I clear my schedule and let him have all of my time.
…for Christmas trees! Alllll the Christmas trees.
…for being able to look forward to Racy's dates when I have ants in my pants. 
…for Beautiful Eulogy and the lyrics to According to God that pretty much speak my thoughts. 
…for Wednesday afternoons with Michelle and all that she teaches me and our exploration of our love languages and what that looks like in our lives. 
…for honest breakfasts with Ashley and the way we can laugh about our similarities.
…for paper snowflakes, Christmas socks, and Christmas twine. 
…for prayer nights that recenter our hearts on Paul's words in Romans 9 and remind us to give up control.
…for a bible study that isn't afraid to ask questions, a co-leader that isn't afraid to speak truth and put her beliefs into words, and a group of friends who can pray for and support each other.