[Over the Weekend]

I am thankful…

…for dates with my best friend Molly that include time to paint and talk and laugh. 

…for hilarious a cappella concerts with old friends.

…for Friday nights spent sitting on my bed, knitting and sleeping early. 

…for safety.

…for those days when I am just glad to come back to my dorm and the people that I love there.

…for movie nights and the laughter and jokes and shared friendship.

…for spontaneous stargazing, running through old corn fields, drinking hot coffee, watching this movie, wrapping up like a burrito, and being accepted in all of my weirdness. 

…for Maddie Vetsch and Jordan Gilbertson and all of the light and joy they bring to my life.

…for mothers who respond to sick texts at 5am.

…for friends who are understanding and forgiving.

…for Molly Bray, who brings me meals in to go boxes and checks on me three times a day.

…for afternoons spent editing videos.

…for five women that hold a special place in my heart getting ready for the big concert and letting me take an excess of pictures of them.

…for Sunday night prayer time and the restoration and freedom it brings. 

[Gratitude]

My dear friend Alexi's blog is reminding me so often to be thankful. I have thought before about creating blog posts specifically about gratitude, but I wanted this whole blog to be thankful and praiseworthy to God. But you know what, friends? Some days all I want to do is make lists of what I am thankful for. And that makes Jesus really happy, I think. 

It is impossible to spend too much time thanking and praising Me. I created you first and foremost to glorify Me. [Jesus Calling]

I am thankful
…for albums on noise trade that come just in the nick of time. 

…for times when I am able to get much-needed homework done.

…for the opportunity to film friends talking about God.

…for Anna Mateffy and her hugs, her care, and her homemade cookies.

…for worship nights that remind me what is most important. 

…for Jesus Calling. That book speaks to me right where I'm at every single day. 

…for a roommate I can cry with and laugh with and be sick around. 

…for light dustings of snow that I can make shoe tracks in.

…for Michelle Shrader and the ability to be real around her. 

…for bananas. 

…for my mama and the comfort and truth she speaks into my life.

…for nights spent in the laundry room pouring out my heart to my sister. 

…for sickness that forces me to slow down and rest.

…for nights spent praying under Christmas lights.

…for off-brand oreos with a little bit of crunchy peanut butter inside. 
..for caring friends who bring me the BRAT pack and sit on my bed just relaxing for hours. 

[Over the Weekend]

Friends, I have so many blog posts running around in my head right now that it almost makes it impossible for me to blog anything. But I had an incredible weekend and I really want to share it. 

Here are some beautiful moments: 

My friends and I road tripped it over to the cities for a fun night of shopping, sampling, nail painting, and getting some delicious food at IHOP. Our waitress Mary was an absolute gem. 

I got to wake up after a full nights rest and go on a real run. It has been so long since I have done that and I haven't felt more like myself in months. It was so good. 

I ate brunch at Randy's with my dear friend Meghan. Talking to her fills me with so much joy and I love to hear what God is teaching her. I am so blessed and humbled by her wisdom.

I got to spend a few hours alone in my room, just getting things done and enjoying the solitude, something that has been greatly lacking in my life lately.

I spent time in the empty library Saturday afternoon, which was actually really relaxing.

Eating my mother's soup made it even better.

Molly and I got to eat dinner and process through some things we are dealing with, which was so refreshing and really helped to further put my mind at ease.

I spent the evening with Luke and our good friends Tom and Kelsey at Tom's house. 

It was great to get off campus and enjoy some tea and relaxing company.

We all painted hybrid spirit animals of ourselves and it was the funniest, most peaceful thing I have done in a long time.

Saturday was the most wonderful day. I felt more like myself than I have in a long time.

Sunday morning, I got to play with two boys, Patrick and Kennan who just fill me with laughter and smiles. Kennan's red hair and kind words melted my heart.

I spent the afternoon with Alexi, filming a video that I will hopefully soon post! I am so excited about it! During filming, I kept having moments where it all just felt surreal. I just couldn't believe how blessed I was to be able to be creating so many forms of art with someone I love so dearly. 

My heart is full and reentered after this weekend. 

I can't explain why, but this weekend has just helped me to regain a sense of self. 

I feel so joyful and blessed to be given this gift of restoration.

[Over the Weekend]

I am thankful…

…for friends that come to take me home, buy me lunch, and don't mind if I sleep in the backseat.

…for warm flannel in chilly houses, for packer bathrooms, and for mothers that say yes to sewing ideas.

…for breakfasts that begin at 11am and include grapefruit, pumpkin pancakes, coffee, and sunshine. 

…for little glass jars with paint splatters and enjoying the process more than the product.

…for adventurous mothers who bring back stories, sadness, laughter and beautiful handmade gifts from Africa. 

…for friends who dress mega-classy, buy me caramel chai, drive me around the state, give me their old clothes, laugh with me, celebrate my joys, and allow me to go home and go to bed at 11pm.

Hightlights include: a Friday morning nap, Annette saying "no" to the worker at Culvers, getting winter necessities like hand lotion, making (and eating) homemade pizza #tradition, touching soft African fabric, stone nativity sets, and rough djembes, sleeping in under a warm wool quilt, solid antique store finds, watching hilarious home videos with my bestie, being gifted with "new"clothes,  drinking Chai with the old crew, reconciling my view of my home church, hearing my mom and Jenny laugh about Africa, making fall hummus, a phone call full of laughter on the way home, prayer and truth from the servant team meeting, winning the apple toss rematch with Jordan, and ending the night with personally selected gifts that speak of care and thought. 

[Letters]

Dear Dad- With it being your birthday month and the smell of all of these fall leaves, I really miss you and the fall hikes we used to take every year. Dear Luke John- You bless me by letting me wear your already-warm flannel, carrying a lactose pill in your wallet for spontaneous ice cream runs, staying up until the wee hours of the morning to spend time with me while I work, bringing me cookies at 10pm, and making me feel like Vincent VanGough when I share my art with you. I am so thankful for you. Dear Alexi- Today we checked "Go to the Goat and eat ice cream for breakfast" off of our bucket list. Thanks for being willing to accomplish this on a 20 degree day. I so value the time I get to spend with you. Dear Home- So far by raiding you I have found: 3 glue sticks, a sweater, wool socks, and 4 rolls of film. Who needs shopping? Dear Mama- Hearing about your trip to Africa fills my heart with joy. Even when you are telling me the "hard stories" I can feel God's heart for the people there and for you. I can't even believe how much you've blessed us by having this experience. The gifts you brought back were the most beautiful things I have ever seen. 

P.S. Today, I made homemade pizza with my mom, drove down Parkridge Ave, watched modern family, went downtown and to hobby lobby, petted my dog, and plugged in my Christmas lights. Even in the midst of tension and confusion about what a "home" is, these things make me feel at peace with where I am.